By Jody Melbourne
The "command and control" approach to keeping children safe from online Cyberbullying is doomed to fail in this age of social networking. Parents need to adopt a high-vigilance, low-touch approach when supporting their children to survive the epidemic of Cyberbullying that is sweeping Australia and many other countries. Last year, South Australian police revealed they were receiving reports of Cyberbullying on an almost daily basis.
"Cyberbullying" is a term coined to describe the age-old practice of schoolyard bullying extended online, using technology as a tool to harass an individual. Examples of Cyberbullying include spreading nasty rumours by email or online postings; publishing online or emailing embarrassing photos or videos; making abusive comments online; and even threatening or intimidating someone online.
Rapid technology uptake by youngsters has extended bullying from the playground to the online environment. While the core bullying behaviour remains the same, the spread of playground bullying through technology to social networks is causing rumours to spread much faster.
As a result, the impact of bullying online can escalate very quickly. The reach of these technologies is something that many parents cannot fathom. Rumours can spread faster than a bushfire. Once something is online, it can go global quickly and can last forever.
The biggest danger is potential damage to the self-esteem of an impressionable 
young person. Kids take things very seriously. Getting harassed about something trivial can be a living hell for a teenager. Not having someone to talk to is one of the biggest frustrations they face.
In one sense, because these are age-old playground problems that have always been there, they require the same ways of dealing with it: Awareness; education; warning children what to expect.
It is important to give kids freedom on the Internet rather than impose authority or try to limit them. The Big Brother approach is not going to work. It will only encourage them to subvert controls.
Parents need to partner with their children by understanding what sites their kids are using and why they are using them. Parents should encourage learning and exploration. Allow youngsters to take a few scrapes. Kids need to fall off the bike and skin their knees a few times to learn what to expect.
It is important not to throw out the baby with the bathwater. Cyberbullying is often presented as a threat from social networking sites or Internet messaging, but these are not the problem, they're just technologies.
The point is that kids are choosing to use these technologies to communicate with each other and share their social lives now. Parents need to understand what these things are, so they can talk the same language as their children. Being time-poor is no excuse. Parents need to find a slice of time to learn what these social networking sites are all about, so they can help their children deal with them.
What you can tell your children:
1. Expect duplicity on the Internet. Schoolyard bullying is amplified by technology, so untrue rumours and embarrassing photos can spread faster and further online.
2. Respect your own privacy and take care of the information you put online. It can go global in minutes and be there forever. It then belongs to someone else and it is out of your control.
3. Report any disturbing online behaviours to administrators of Web 2.0 sites such as MySpace or FaceBook. These administrators take misbehaviour seriously. You need to alert them about harassment and abuse so they can do something about it.
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Jody Melbourne is an Information Security Consultant for information security specialist CQR Consulting. CQR Consulting delivers independent information security services, without the need to sell computer hardware, software or other technology services. Jody has particular expertise in security and privacy issues for Web 2.0 technologies, such as social networking sites and instant messaging, which are embraced enthusiastically by youngsters.
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Comments
Don't forget that bullying is itself unacceptable
I'd say Jody makes some good points, especially around parental responsibility.
And yet to me his blog feels a little complacent. First and foremost, let's remember that with no exceptions, bullying is unacceptable. Schools, education departments and workplaces too for that matter invest major time and effort addressing it. So to compare bullying with the inevitablility of skinning your knees is to accept it. And to appeal to the idea that kids "need to fall off the bike" appears to me to actually condone bullying.
I'm also worried by the idea that "social networking sites or Internet messaging ... are not the problem, they're just technologies". The Internet as a communications medium is quantitatively and qualitatively very different from what's gone before it. The speed and reach of bullying online is obviously greater than what used to happen in the school yard and over the phones. But the damage done is deeper too, for cyber bullying can cause one's whole digital persona to be wrecked.
Technology cannot be blameless (unless one is in the anarchic "guns don't kill people, people do" school of thought). Remember that peer-to-peer file sharing was described by its proponents as just another copying mechanism, just like compact cassettes, nothing to worry about. But try the 'don't blame the technology' line on the music industry today and you'll get quite an argument!
We have unleashed some amazing and startlingly powerful tools with the Internet, and it's about time we acknowledged that achieving Internet safety is going to involve more than mere education. Just like road safety and almost every other risky caper in the real world, in addition to teaching people skills and awareness, we also need a concomitant ensemble of enforceable rules and strong standardised technologies that protect people from harm.
Stephen Wilson is Managing Director of the Lockstep Group.
Lockstep Consulting provides independent advice and analysis on identity
management, PKI and smartcards. Lockstep Technologies develops unique
new smart technologies to address transaction privacy and web fraud.
keep your distance, but keep watch
The internet is a great tool for kids, and I think they should be able to explore it, as an informaiton source as well as a means of interacting with their friends. However, I'm a big one for keeping the computer out of the kids bedrooms and in a public space.
In the same way I wouldn't want them loitering at the local mall with people I don't know, I don't want them loitering online either. Yes, it's important to strick a balance between privacy and safety, and let kids fall over occasionally, but I like to keep watch from a distance, just in case they suddenly need help.
School Project.
Hey Guys;
Im in year 10 & as a part of my Aust. studies class; we have to research an major issuse.
I choose Cyber-bulling as you can see;
Im hoping that if they are any Parents, who use this site, they would give me there thoughts on this. As i know that Cuber-bulling affects not only the victims; but also their parents.
Thanks.
Jessimacaa.