Dads Helping Kids Win
As we celebrate Fathers’ Day this year, we are still feeling the effects of a global financial crisis with an accompanying financial deficit but our society appears to be suffering most of all from a love deficit.
Our bourgeoning prison population would seem to be the best indicator of this deficit. The great majority of prison inmates, some figures say 78%, have grown up in fatherless homes. Indeed it is the single, largest predictor of crime and incarceration.
Fatherlessness and family breakdown, as verified by the divorce rate, have been growing for decades. The good news is that things are beginning to change when it comes to long term love. The divorce rate in Australia peaked to an all time high in 2001 but had dropped 18% in overall numbers by 2008. There were over 118,00registered marriages in Australia in 2008, the highest number of marriages registered since 1990 and an increase of 14.5% since the marriage low point in 2001.
The tide is beginning to turn. Our society has hit the wall and the wall is hard. Divorce is a very painful experience for all concerned. Our children often take decades to recover. The cumulative pain is becoming too much to bear and our society is looking for answers. Our society has lost much over the last few decades, but that very loss might become part of our inspiration to reverse the love deficit.
Perhaps the inspiration to reverse the love deficit is coming from our young people, many of whom know the pain of fatherlessness first hand. Older people and politicians think that young people aren’t interested in marriage and family but nothing could be further from the truth. In a study released in 2002 in ‘Family Matters’, a publication of the ‘Australian Institute of Family Studies’, over 80% of 17 and 18 year old teenagers want to get married. Over 75% of 17 and 18 year old teenagers want to have children and become mums and dads, most sooner than later, and over 90% want a long-term relationship which in our adult world of ‘throw away’ relationships is revolutionary to say the least.
Another indicator of the renewed desire to strengthen marriage and support the natural biological family was the inaugural National Marriage Day breakfast held on 13th August, in the Great Hall of Parliament House, Canberra. Five hundred people jammed the Great Hall for a mid-week celebration of life and love, organised by the Australian Family Association. Major General Michael Jeffery, Australia’s former Governor General, was appointed with his wife Marlena as National Marriage Day Ambassadors.
The popularity of ‘Find My Family’, one of the highest rating shows on TV, is mute testament to the hunger for deeper family relationships. The massive popularity of the ‘ World’s Strictest Parents’ is according to a recent article in the Herald Sunan indicator of a shift in values. The article stated, "The difference in 2009 is that networks realise that the mood of Australian TV viewers has changed and they are hankering for positive, uplifting reality shows."
Maybe our society is beginning to listen to the voice of our children. Dads4Kids Fatherhood Foundation has recently completed its community service announcements (CSAs) that will be released for Father’s Day and aired for the rest of the year. This Fathers’ Day we asked children what advice they would give to Australia’s fathers. An eleven year old boy said, ‘Fathers should spend more time with their children and less time at work." A seven year old girl added that Dads should let their children win when they play games with them. Her words became the caption for the CSA campaign, ‘Dads – Helping Kids Win’ When dads put their children first they create a win-win situation.
Dads are responding, TV stations are listening and our culture seems to be turning around. A Renewal of Fatherhood, Family Revival or a Love Revolution. Whatever you call it, if it continues, there will be empty gaols dotted all over the Australian landscape. That would be a big win for our nation, our families and our children.
Warwick Marsh is the founder of the Fatherhood Foundation with his wife Alison. They have 5 children and have been married for 33 years. Warwick is on the board of a number of non profit organisations and has been working in the community on a voluntary basis for 18 years. His background is as a musician and creative communicator/TV producer. Warwick is also the editor in chief of Australia’s longest running weekly electronic ezine for Dads called ‘fathersonline’ which started in 2002. In 2001 Warwick received a Centenary Medal from the Governor General for service in musical leadership for young people and the Aboriginal community and his international missions and aid work.
