Friendship can inspire peace
In April 2011, the United Nations declared July 30 to be the International Day of Friendship. When I mentioned this to a friend, he scoffed: Why would the United Nations make a fuss over something as trivial as friendship? To those who might share his incredulity, consider the potential of friendship to inspire peace.
Friendship is a world-wide phenomenon. Young or old, no matter what culture, we’ve all experienced the feeling of looking into another person’s eyes and finding warm companionship. While friendships differ, one element features in all: understanding. We strive to understand our friends and wish for them to understand us. We look past the stereotypes and are willing to help them be their best. Experiencing friendship makes us better people, undergoing what Kahlil Gibran called the "deepening of the spirit".
This understanding and growth is the nub of why friendship is so important. By declaring an International Day of Friendship, the United Nations has affirmed the potential of friendship to be harnessed for worldwide good. Friendship is a path to appreciating our common humanity. When people see each other as fellow human beings first, it increases empathy and the desire to understand.
Imagine if we viewed and treated everyone in the world as we did our friends. A woman starving in Somalia elicits a desire to help, a stark difference in world views becomes something to discuss and mediate. Imagine how our political and corporate leaders would alter their priorities. If this sounds too simplistic, you may be underestimating the power of friendship. As social scientists exploring intergroup contact theory have recognised for years, friendship can transform "us and them" to just "us".
Of course, the concept of friendship is not alone in promoting universal respect. The doctrine of human rights for instance successfully encourages peace, underpinned by the laudable Universal Declaration of Human Rights. Friendship is complementary to these more formalised measures, to be used in tandem as an easily accessible, universal avenue for peace promotion.
I’ve witnessed how transformative the power of friendship can be first hand. I founded The Friendship Page in 1996 to promote peace through friendship and watched the millions of people flocking to our community each year. I’ve seen people from countries with a history of conflict realise there’s another side to each story. Elderly conservatives gain a new perspective after becoming friends with young people identifying as GLBTI. Friendships formed online and then continued in person – many friends flying around the world to meet, experiencing other cultures in the process. Peace growing, one friendship at a time.
The United Nations was right to bring our attention to friendship. On July 30, let’s celebrate this important part of our lives. Reach out to your friends and let them know they are truly appreciated. Open your hearts to befriending someone new. And when you read about someone you consider different, consider them with fresh eyes. You never know how your life, and our world – might be enriched as a result.
Bronwyn Polson is a lawyer and author from Melbourne. She founded The Friendship Page in 1996 to promote peace through friendship and now welcomes over eight million visitors annually from around the globe. Passionate about peace, Bronwyn holds a BA/LLB and an LLM focusing on human rights.
