Unplug and play

It’s a big job being a child’s most important teacher. Leonie Percy invites parents to take the time to reflect, be present and find a mindful moment with their child.

According to UNICEF, the unhappiest children in the world are in the UK and the USA – two of the most powerful and among the wealthier countries in the world.

Yet when we travel, we see children in the most impoverished places with smiles from ear to ear. In India, where a majority of people live in poverty, they also live with open hearts and are genuinely happy and kind. Kids play with sticks and stones for hours. Family is strong.

The popular African proverb ‘It takes a whole village to raise a child’ seems lost in our developed world. Many of us live away from our families and are disconnected from our roots.

This is why we need to support, guide and nurture our children so they feel more able to cope with the inevitable trials and tribulations that life will throw at them.

Research suggests that depression is being seen in children as young as three years old. The scariest thing is that children can suffer psychologically without telling anyone because the issue is not being dealt with.

Children from affluent backgrounds are not immune; often struggling despite being showered with gifts in compensation for the one thing they need most – time with their most important role models, their mother and father.

At school, children get taught how to read, write and do arithmetic but they also need to be taught about reflection, relationships and resilience. Compassion and empathy must be taught so they can build and sustain good relationships, whether at home, at school or out in the world.

Children have the ability to be unstoppable. But because they, as humans, are incredibly complex beings, they need to learn about how their feelings and thoughts work, as well as about numbers and grammar.

Life will always challenge us, no matter how sophisticated or simple, rich or poor we are. So we cannot expect our children to navigate their way through the minefield of life without understanding what being mindful means.

It’s a big job being your child’s most important teacher. They need to learn about the workings of their brain, their mind and their relationships; how to discover their specialness, their purpose and their goodness; how their thoughts and feelings become their actions; how to care for their bodies and develop their intelligence, a social conscience and creativity; plus much more. So let’s look at your job description as parent more closely.

Teaching about self

Your job as a parent is to help your child discover the best about themselves, so that they understand what their purpose is in life, what their talents are and the best way to use them. You must also help them understand what it means to be a good person, so they need to understand their thoughts and feelings, which will become their actions.

Teaching about body

The problems of unhealthy eating and inactivity are massive lifestyle issues children need to know about. One-quarter of Australian kids are overweight or obese due to unhealthy food choices – being given and choosing highly processed convenience food full of fat and sugar – and a lack of physical activity.

Your responsibility begins with giving your children healthy food from the first mouthful and being a role model in the way you live.  Overweight parents often raise overweight children. And overweight kids become overweight adults.

Be aware of the many health and social problems that come with overweight and obesity, including children being diagnosed with type 2 diabetes (not the genetic type of diabetes but the type that results from an unhealthy lifestyle).

Show your child what healthy food is and explain that we need to eat a balanced diet to nourish our body and mind. Teach your child about eating whole foods.

Teaching about physicality, flexibility and resilience

Kids need to be active. They need to be outside playing in nature. Let them climb trees so they learn how to fall and get back up again.

Many children suffer from asthma and allergies. Many are overprotected – wrapped in cotton wool. Let kids get dirty. This is not only an essential part of play but it will test and strengthen their immune system, too.

The original play station didn’t need plugging in – it was known as the backyard, local park, bush reserve or neighbourhood street.

Don’t miss another heart-melting moment
with your children. 

Above all, be present.

It would be unrealistic in this life for us to be physically present with our children all the time. But when you are with them, be really present.

By being distracted all the time you are telling them they are not important and you are missing precious moments you may never get a chance to experience again. Being present helps us to tune in and feel connected. It also eliminates some of the guilt we feel as parents.

Time to reflect…

We seem to have forgotten how to log off, take our child’s hand and go for a walk to refresh our minds.

Children don’t play in the same way anymore and it’s affecting their brains and resilience. Creative play is an essential part of child development.

Through regular mindfulness, children learn resilience, to calm their minds, feel more connected and to play again, in the present moment.

Find your mindful moment today…

• Read your child a fairy tale
• Unplug play and be present with your kids
• Eat healthy food together as a family
• Get outside and climb a tree
• Go for a mindful bush walk